just wanna tell a today story in English before went to bed…
In the morning before went to campus, I had been already finished my draft paper. Start a day with little bit confusing thing. I had not yet study the section which I had to present in the study meeting. One of my friend asked help for setting her sample. Around 12.15 I went back to my room for lunch… and no way…. the kitchen was on repaired 
what should I do?? went back to my desk bought some onigiri in canteen and ate in my room :p after praying time my Egyptian friend called… ” Could we meet today? I just went to your office and no you there..I will leave Japan soon.Just wanna say goodbye to u.” She will leave on Monday afternoon.. “OK” I said “I will go to ur desk after this. wait a minute”. So I was there… in the corridor of her office… and she came… at first everything just fine… talked ourselves conditions.. our job.. and then say goodbye.. I still can smile with no tears… Until now I never cry directly when I said goodbye… Yeah.. just positive thinking that someday we will meet again right?? when God give us that chance… nothing impossible… You go for the better life…no need to become sad even though I can not deny that in many case I was crying after that goodbye ceremonies :p far from everything.. when I have enough time for thinking and feeling..only me or with some closest friends :p at least people who leaving or staying did not know at all…
Ok back to the topic… I don’t know how its started but my tear started to fall down.. she hugged me deeply… said I have to be strong.. fight for my paper..for my life.. and so on… that I have to keep Syahadat in my mind.. just usual things actually.. but it makes me cry… yeah… I know she means a lot for me… for my life… we are different in some ways… I rarely met her… But Allah sent her to me in the recent years in the right moment..
remembering….
She is the first Moslem I met in Japan when I did not use hijab at that time. 2 week after my arriving here… just alone… no friends yet… no Indonesian friends yet ( I met other Indonesians after 2 months in Japan)…absolutely alone (only with Allah)… I met her in japanese class. Surprise and fell happy because I could see people with hijab… I gave her smile directly and introduced my self. After that we share the halal and haram information, mosque… and so on… just keep our duty to keep our Moslem sisters and brothers save and fulfilled everything. In the next day however, we keep contact.. I can feel that Allah sent her for gave me a strength and kept my mind not become a zombie… yeah I ever became a zombie here.. flat… can’t think anything… can’t feel anything… yeah just like that…full under depression 
)
I will remember that she was the first people who I know, saw me with hijab at my first day using hijab even though she will not changed my mind to use or not the hijab. That is absolutely my decision. second, her daughter remind me how I love and miss my niece so much… how I missed her innocent smile and my best time which I ever had with her… at that time I just freeze. already forget how to play and talk to kids Third, she came to my office and looking for me when I was in the highest peak becoming a zombie :p she said at that time that she just wanna see me.. I am fine or not or something… At that time I just like stupid people can’t say anything just answered what she asked.. yeah that condition was so funny… I am 100% zombie at that time :p she finally said that she had to go, happy I was fine and didn’t want to disturb my job. After back to my desk, I did not know.. just fell better… and I can think again as human :p I thank to her so much for that day… I thank to Allah so much, sent her to me in the right place and in the right time. After that yeah.. we still keep contact and also I went to Eidul fitri prayer together with she and her family.
Yeah…that’s why she means a lot for me in this 1.5 years. Wish she has happy life with her family, get better position, and everything.. I know Allah will take care of her.. who knows… someday we will meet. Wish we still keep contact after this… keep the “silahturahim” forever…
one of my hard part in my life has been passed… the good thing is I think I can manage now of course it is because of Allah… I know it will be the next hard day and day… but, I will try to fight. Recently i have no enough power to fight but i will keep on my mind for fight even though with the slowest speed.. however.. I will fight… the hardest enemy is ourselves right?? so the next of my problems is myself.. I have to make a compromise to myself in every step in my life…
I can breath today… Thanks God… I still could fell, think, and learn for everything in this world… Thanks to all of my family, friends, and everyone who I know in my life.
Nite ^_^
